WTF????

Okay, I didn't actually take these pictures (camera is out of commission), but I did consume the same sort of weird looking creatures tonight, minus the green sauce. What the hell are they, you might wonder. Iguana feet? Cactus? A genetic experiment involving God-knows-what? The answer is... gooseneck barnacles!

I stopped by Monterey Fish for my weekly visit, when I usually pick some kind of seafood to prepare for dinner, and a light lunch of half a dozen or so oysters. At 75 cents a pop, it's quite a deal, especially compared with Zuni, Hog Island, or even Swan. You just have to shuck 'em yourself, which is quite easy, and prepare the mignonette (also fairly simple). But this time, lo and behold, nestled in the shellfish tray lay the barnacles. I vaguely remembered reading an article once that mentioned certain types of edible barnacles, but I couldn't recall exactly what it said. Since I've always regretted not taking home some whole scallops on the shell in one of my visits, I grabbed a few and find out what they tasted like. The lady next to me asked me if I knew what to do with them. "No idea. I'm going to find out." "Maybe they'll be like mirugai." I'd had mirugai (or geoduck) as sashimi and nigiri at sushi restaurants, and I recalled my mother preparing it when I was growing up. She peeled the "trunk" and chopped it into soup, or sliced it, then sauteed it. I asked the counterboy for suggestions. Unsure himself, he pointed me to a guide they kept behind the counter, a sort of seafood reference manual - Larousse Gastronomique for fishermen. "You'll have to tell me what they're like." The manual suggested steaming or boiling the crustaceans, peeling off the leathery rind and biting off the tender flesh beneath. Didn't sound too difficult. Googling "gooseneck barnacles" resulted in the same instructions.

At first, I was going to saute the barnacles with the night's moules marinieres, but I decided that I wanted to distill the flavor, so steaming seemed to be the best option. I scrubbed them under running water, and used the copper steamer Jen gave me to cook them for about 5 minutes over boiling water. I pulled out the first one and peeled the trunk with my fingers. The rind was leathery, but gave way easily. The flesh inside was about pinky size (the outside was about thumb sized) and bright orange. It had the texture of something like a cross between calamari and mussels, and it tasted like lobster - briny and delicious! Most recipes suggesting dipping the edible meat in butter, but I found it to be flavorful enough by itself. Since the juices (which will stain!) tend to squirt if you're not careful, I trimmed a little bit of the trunk end off, then cut a slit lengthwise for easier peeling. If you like shellfish, I suggest trying some of these if you ever come across them. They might be especially fun at a Halloween party!