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Tuesday, March 07, 2006

Fashion blogging the Oscars

Like I said before, I haven't seen too many of the nominees this year, so I reserve my right to withold judgment on the films nominated (Crash? Really? It was good but it wasn't all that), but I *will* judge what people wore.

Reese Witherspoon. I think she went with makeup and hair that was very true to her personal style, and the dress was beautiful. I can't really say anything too bad about the dress, except to add that if I were going to go with vintage 50's Dior, you might as well try to find something New Look (1947-ish). In fact, I think something New Look is a little more Reese than what she chose.

Charlize Theron. Dude, that huge bow looked like a giant alien head. I was reminded of the episode of the Simpsons where Mr. Burns has his head transplanted next to Homer's.

Nicole Kidman. Yes, we get it. You're tall and thin. It only serves to enhance how botoxed your forehead is. That being said, I thought the dress itself was gorgeous. I loved the delicate embroidery and beading and the softly belled fishtail hemline, but it just made Nicole look like a skeletal ghost. The green Dior and the ruffled pink Chanel of Oscars past were much more flattering.

Jennifer Aniston. The dress was okay, nothing special, though. But seriously, if your ex was running around adopting kids with and impregnating Angelina Jolie, wouldn't you try to wear something more memorable? I'm thinking along the lines of Jennifer Lopez's green Versace Grammy dress... it doesn't have to be that naked, but should make a statement.

Michelle Williams. I actually really liked that dress. Yeah, it was mustard yellow, but it didn't wash her out, like Cate Blanchett last year. And with the red lipstick, it looked great contrasting against the red carpet.

Jessica Alba. That dress was great. Fit scarily well... she looked like a Barbie doll or something. Eat a sandwich, girl! But soften the hairdo a little.

Salma Hayek. I thought she looked great. Gorgeous color on her, flattering cut, nice hair. Very well put together.

Hilary Swank. I kept thinking her boobs were going to pop out of her dress. Even then, she still kinda looked mannish.

Felicity Huffman. I love that she's fortysomething and working a dress that's nearly cut to her navel. It doesn't look super vulgar... it probably helps that her boobs aren't exploding out of her chest. Okay, and I'm pretty biased towards Zac Posen.

Ziyi Zhang. Gorgeous girl, talented actress, no boobs at all. Not that there's anything wrong with that (I myself am a flat chested girl). Generally, us flat chested girls stray away from strapless. Also, dark colors on top and light colors below serve to minimize the upper body. Combined with the constricting nature of the dress, she looked two dimensional, like a cardboard cutout.

Dolly Parton. I have a soft spot for Dolly. I think everyone does. But how does she keep such a tiny waist? I though she was going to break in half!

Other remarks: That longish hair looks awful on Tom Hanks. And wearing jeans with a tuxedo jacket is just tacky. Dude must have though he wasn't going to win.

Okay! That's it for now.


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