Why oh why, Marie Claire?

Why do you dangle Jude Law, in a shared cover with Gwyneth Paltrow, in front of us like the grapes in front of Tantulus? I snatched the periodical from the rack at my gym, and eagerly turned the pages in order to learn the "first time [Jude] ever..." to discover that only Gwyneth's firsts were listed. Imagine my dismay. As if I care. I even counted the pages to make sure that no overzealous gym bunny Jude Law fanatic had ripped out his pages. But alas, all the pages of the magazine were intact. The only blurbs about Jude Law were Gwyneth's "five things I love about Jude Law." Hell, *I* could list five things I love about Jude Law.

1. He's hot!
2. He's very hot!
3. He's really hot!
4. He's soooooo hot!
5. He's fucking hot!

I guess it shouldn't surprise me that a Hearst publication would resort to such underhanded tactics.